Hey friends, how are you today? How is your day? Did you, like me, hit the ground running? I promised myself, I would make a conscience effort to slow down, but that dream can only become a reality, when I intentionally take the time to slow down.  As an empty~nester, it feels very wrong for me to be idle.  I just can’t do, I don’t know how, therefore, I’ve made some changes.  I’ve added more responsibilities to a not so empty schedule.  I now work five days a week, instead of two or three and very soon, I will be starting a young ladies bible study. The truth is these are not very difficult tasks, but they are time consuming.  Time consuming, did I already say, time consuming? Add two blog posts a week and I may be ready for bedlam. Thank God, He is in the time management business.  Do you believe that our Lord gives you the time to complete excellently, everything He has called you to perform? Hebrews 4 12I am an all or nothing person.  Perhaps you’ve seen evidence of that, through the words of various blog posts.  I’ve always struggled with balance that in between ‘all’ or ‘nothing’ place.  Every-time I think I’ve arrived at that ‘balance’ point, I relax my defenses and gradually slip into that ‘all’ or ‘nothing’ neighborhood again.  A few years ago, I wanted to cultivate Proverbs 31:26 into my life.  Proverbs 31 26Can you guess how that went? I also combined Proverbs 17:28 (go ahead… read it, I’ll wait), because of the similarity and totally left out ‘she opens her mouth with wisdom’.  Ladies and gentlemen, for almost six months, I hardly said a word.  I spoke quite often to the Lord, I told Him of all my frustrations and about everything that was wrong with my world. That ‘all’ or ‘nothing’ trait allows fear to, at times, determine my course; in these situations, I do not nothing.  Sometimes, my own capabilities determine my actions; if I’m capable, then this job will be done, but if I’ve determined that I won’t be successful, then I’m in that ‘nothing’ camp.  I’ve come to the realization, that trusting the Lord is fundamental to our walk with Him. Yes, I know… it was a surprise to me too.  Sometimes, I can literally imagine the Lord shaking His head at me.  ‘Wow! Brenda, I just can’t; after all this time together, why are you still there?”   Anyway, about six’s months later, I had a light bulb moment.  Usually, verbs connote an action, ‘she opens’… she has to do something; she can’t be in that ‘nothing’ camp, because she ‘opens’ her mouth; but with a beautiful qualifier, ‘with wisdom’.  That takes thought and intentionality.  rom 5 20Have you ever asked the Lord to help you with a character flaw?  Have you ever wanted Him to replace that flaw with His character?  Well I did, but instead of relying on Him to make that change, I attempted to fix it myself.  Although, I did not realize it at the time, that ‘all’ or ‘nothing’ neighborhood, is totally me, trying to do God’s work.  You see, God is all about balance.  He has given us time to do every work; He has called us to perform, including time for ourselves.  He gives us the time to gradually inculcate His characters, such as patience, wisdom, love, but if you’re like me, we want to ‘be’ rather than ‘become’. We begin at the starting point, but we want to wake up at the finish line.  It took time to add the weight; it will take time to shed the extra pounds.  If we enter into that ‘nothing’ district, not only will nothing be done, but sometimes, we miss out on the beauty that can be ours, because we will not try, or we get into that ‘all’ camp, and attempt to solve all world problems on our own.    In reality, we are slowing down the process of ‘becoming’ when we try to ‘be’ without God.  It’s really not possible to be godly without God.  I am learning that God does ‘change’ best.  He is patient and He does not give up, nor does He get frustrated (although He would have every right to) like I do.  He knows that change takes time, because His change goes in the opposite direction of our natural tendencies.  II Tim 3 15When I surrender to God, He takes my ‘all’ or ‘nothing’ tendencies and replaces it with balance.  Come along on this journey with me of..



51 Thoughts

  1. Oh my goodness girlfriend I’ve struggle with this too. Great post, thank you for sharing. Part of mine is fibromyalgia and mixed connective tissue disease, I go, go, go and I can’t go anymore. I’m down for a bit. But when you feel good one day you’re like want to do it all. I’m still learning to trust God to lead me in this area and pace myself and but gosh it’s so hard. I did some things this past weekend cus I wanted to do to bless my hunky man lol unfortunately for me his love language is “acts of service” 😂But goodness the things that mean so much to him are so hard for me to do these days and I really want to. I had to pray through the whole time. I knew I should’ve stopped earlier than I did but I didn’t and for 2 days after I paid for it. Lord help me to find balance.
    Big hugs💗
    Can I reblog this?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. God Bless You!! I Personally has taste a lot of what you have shared. I’m not going to type a lot. I have come along way in my journey, My experiences is for me in knowing Who Jesus Christ is. Having Intimacy with Him. There is so much that He wants us to know about Him. He knows everything about us. So I have been learning to be still, something I was not use to,because I have always thought I had to be busy. He wants to take care of us. Because we as humans are very fragile. He wants us to listen to be still so we won’t miss what He has In stored for us. So that He can equip us before we receive our assignments. I said this was going to be short right? 😁🥰😊💕 God Bless you!, God is Able and He is Fathful and so much more, He has ((All)) the answers. He is Truthful! He knows what we need, and don’t need. We can go too Him and talk to Him at anytime. I enjoyed what you have shared. Agape!! Shalom!! I’m done😁😍 ((Hugs)) 🙂

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  3. You’re so right! God is all about perfect balance. Trying to achieve this on our own, I believe, is impossible but “…with men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26). We all have to “keep strict watch that how you walk is not as unwise but as wise persons, making the best use of your time, because the days are wicked” (Ephesians 5:15,16) and “make sure of the more important things” (Philippians 1:10). I hope you achieve your goals.

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  4. Oh balance….yeah…..need to work on that one, lol 😉 I am terrible at finding that balance. But, like you, I am trying and working on it. Thank goodness God is in control and SO very patient, lol!! God Bless!

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  5. Your article is very encouraging! We are all just human right now, but as the Body of Christ we can uplift each other! I appreciate your transparency and may our Lord continue to bless you and grow you as you seek Him!

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  6. Oh my goodness, this hit home in my heart. You see, the Lord has asked me to write something. I love to write, I love that this is the gift God gave me; it’s who I am and how I express myself. But He’s asked me to get very vulnerable and so I’m filling my hours with ‘all’ so I have no time for the real task at hand. My word for this year is overcomer (I’ve been fighting this written story for several years) so it gives me hope that I will win the battle because of Him, but it also terrifies me to share the truth of who I am. May I cling to your encouragement and go for the all. Thank you.

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  7. I’m nearly an empty nester (6 mo.?) and also have more free time which I’m enjoying but need to structure so I don’t waste it!! There’s always work at home/on our farm; some seasons are extremely busy but now, after holidays and before calving, it’s a bit quieter. God leads through every season…if we just trust and follow!

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      1. Amen! Maybe because when we find a balance that we feel works, at least for me, a sense of control tends to crawl into it and God is like, “No, this is not about you. Let’s switch some things up.” ❤

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  8. Yeah, that ‘change’ thing. Sometimes I know I need to change; okay, take me there. But sometimes (a lot), I like where I am and want to stay there. God’s grace says that He will not let me be stagnant (because then I slide back and get putrid), so He leads me in His Way. I do thank God for that but ~stifled sigh~ it’s hard.
    This: “His change goes in the opposite direction of our natural tendencies.” That’s a profound statement, and that there is why it’s hard.
    Love your posts, Brenda! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I agree that I have to give it to the Lord or I tend to be work-work-work or read-watch movie-read-relax. I have been doing better since asking Him to direct each day and found a balance between many things and have been showing up and being present for myself and others more often.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Great post and a good wake up call too for me… The part that really struck me is when you talk about “trusting the Lord is fundamental to our walk with Him” I totally agree

    Liked by 2 people

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