Becoming HIS Tapestry

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WHEN THE SILENCE IS DEAFENING!!

Hi friends, how are you today? Our weekend was a bit challenging to say the least.  We got almost two feet of snow in less than twenty four hours, and the temperature dipped into the subzero range.  Even our Sunday service had to be cancelled.  In all the years, I’ve been at this church, this is an unprecedented move, but when a snow storm comes with a name, unprecedented moves are acceptable.  And I’ve got proof…

But enough about me, how are you doing? How was your weekend?

Have you ever prayed and prayed and prayed for something? Have you ever wanted something so badly that it consumed every thought, every speech, and every prayer?  Perhaps your life has been in limbo; neither up nor down, neither left nor right, while you waited for an answer from God? Of course, we both know that not any answer will do, oh no…. not any answer will do, my friend.   psalm 139 7A few years ago, I was this person.  I wanted something from the Lord; something I knew only He could give; so I waited for Him to do what He does best; perform a miracle.  I waited and I waited and I waited.  But in this regard, He said nothing.  Not. One. Single. Word! I begged and I pleaded with Him, I just knew that if I had this ‘thing’ surely life would be perfect, now.  So, I prayed and waited and prayed and waited some more.  Still, in this regard, the Lord said nothing.  This went on for about two years, back and forth and back and forth; I was just existing, not really living; I routinely performed my duties. Thank the Lord for His infinite patience with simple minded people.   psalm 139 8Now, I must preface this post, by saying that I always spent time with the Lord.  Well… I guess I had to; He is my Miracle Worker, remember? But there is something rather astounding about the Word of God, isn’t there? Eventually it does what it was intended to do, our God is truly amazing. Hebrews 4 12Eventually the Lord allowed me to remember, because it’s so easy to forget His tender mercies.    Did I really love the Lord, or did I love His gifts more? Did I trust Him or did I trust Him to give to me? Did I love Him only for what He can give to me? Did I perhaps regard Him as my own personal genie?  The answer to these questions laid in my reaction to the silence.  The non-existence life, I lived proved I didn’t really trust the Lord.   The constant longing for something I didn’t posses indicated my obsession and belief that my life or at least my happiness depended on it.  

How did I get there? When did I forget how great my God was? When did anything become more valuable than my God? 

Thank the Lord for His absolute faithfulness.  psalm 139 9 10I did not set out to make this ‘thing’ more important, that was certainly unintentional. It’s a slippery slope isn’t? Even the ‘good’ things can begin to replace the Lord, if we’re not careful. But that was the problem! I was not careful, I was not intentional. I believed, albeit unknowingly, that I was in control, that my way was the best way; I forgot I had an enemy. The enemy’s battle is not necessarily with me, per se, his battle is really against God.  Anything that will cause me to doubt the love and compassion of this Holy and Righteous God is on the table. psalm 139 11,12The silence eventually makes us believe that the Lord is untrustworthy; that He doesn’t love us; that He couldn’t possibly understand or even care about our circumstances.  Unbelief slowly, gradually, inevitably sets into our hearts.  But by continuously reading the Word of God, (which is alive, by the way) it finds that tiny, slither of fertile ground left and  begins to give hope again; it gradually brings restoration, brings peace.  The Lord does that for us through His Word and even through people and also by answering other prayers.  He refuses to forsake us and leave us where we are; in our unfaithfulness.  John 10 10You, who are losing hope; you, who are feeling desperate, the Lord has not abandon you, He has not left.  I know you may not want to hear it; but truthfully you are the one doing the leaving; doing the abandoning. You are the one drifting, but even there; even in that place, the Lord is there.  He promised to be there, and He always keeps His promises.  Don’t stop reading your bible, dear friend.  Don’t stop going to church, continue to surround yourself with faithful people, especially on the days, you don’t feel like it.  There; you will eventually remember God’s faithfulness.closing1thanks buttonbrenda

 

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53 responses to “WHEN THE SILENCE IS DEAFENING!!”

  4. Brenda… this is beautiful. So timely for a season I just ended. While I didn’t slip away in time, I was similar to how you mentioned about life: I was going through motion versus enjoying my time with the Lord. Like a toddler wanting my way first and then hugs and kisses later, I wanted my answer and s way out of the wilderness season. Little did I realize how much I valued that season and time with Him and the growth it allowed. This was truly a beautiful post!!

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  5. Great post. Reminds me of the times that I was in a one-sided situationship with Christ. Lol. How foolish of me. It’s so easy to get away from who God is when all we are thinking about is what He can do. This was a great reminder to refocus on our savior and not just His abilities. Blessings.

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  6. This hit me really hard today, thank you. My last couple of blog posts have been very low…like I felt so down. But God is as faithful when I feel down or discouraged as he is when things are going great.

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  9. God Bless you Brenda!! May God Continue To use You For His Purpose. That snow is beautiful!! We haven’t received yet. But I know we will in His Name. Thank you for sharing!! \0/\0/ ((Hugs)) Agape!! 🙂

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  10. Love this! I especially love the Bible verses you scatter throughout your posts. Your point of view on waiting and praying is obviously grounded in Scripture and so very motivating. The Lord is always near and always listening; sometimes He just needs us to learn some things from Him and find out what His real will for us is.

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  19. Brrrrr! That’s a lot of snow! To answer your question have I ever prayed and prayed with no answer? Yes. Since 2000, but I will not stop praying, nor will I stop having faith God will answer my prayer. One day my children will bow the knee to Jesus, but in God’s timing not mine. I praise His holy name! Amen!

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  20. Ah, limbo: neither up nor down, neither left nor right. I call that the wilderness journey. Yep, been there. One foot at a time, day by day, waiting for direction, a Word… anything. It’s a hard place to be, but important, as you say, to keep God and His Word first.

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  22. Thank you so much Brenda! Waiting on the Lord and trusting in His timing is a great exercise of faith. Waiting has been one of the biggest challenges of my life. I’m so grateful for His faithfulness and patience with me. I really enjoyed this post and the verses from psalm 139.🌻 Much love. 💚❤

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    • It’s less about the ‘thing’ and more about my attitude toward the ‘thing’. Can anything, should consume more of me, than God Himself? Can I trust Him even when the answer is no? It is remembering that there really is One God and He is not me 😀 I may try to bring Him down to my level, but He will not allow it, which was what I tried to do. I hope this explanation helps. Nothing should replace God in my life, not even the things or people, He puts into my life, or the lack of it.

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