AFRAID OF THE UNKNOWN

This is the last Friday in the month of April.  Today is April 27, with three days left.  How are you doing? How was the month? Was it difficult or not too bad? Was it just okay? Are there any blessings for which you can be thankful? Or do you feel cursed? Were you a blessing to someone at any time during the month?

I am going to be an empty nester soon.  I know, I know what you are thinking! I am way too young to be an empty nester! Yeah, I think so too. Had I known it would come so quickly, I would have had ten children instead of just two! But here we are, ‘hindsight is 20/20’ they say.  Most people want to know what I am going to do, when the girls leave for college in August.  (Can you see the tears, already?)  The truth is… I don’t know! I really don’t know.  I’ve tried planning (because you know I need a plan), but nothing comes to mind.  I thought of writing more blog posts, but at this point, that doesn’t feel right (I think it would stress me out). I thought maybe a day-time bible study with a few of the ladies might be just the thing.  But again, I don’t know… “Lord, I need to know”, I’ve said.  “I don’t like surprises”.  We’ve talked (well, I did most of the talking) and I told the Lord to just let know what He would have me do.  Did you know I have never, in my entire life, been by myself for 24 hours? (I’ve never lived on my own either, for that matter). I went from my parents’ home to my husband’s home.  I know right, crazy! But that’s the truth! Just thinking about the silence is scary.  We homeschooled the girls throughout their formative years and now it’s time to let them go.  Very simply… I’m scared of the unknown. 2-cor-12-9-e1524837017649.jpg Needless to say, the Lord has faithfully said in 2 Corinthians 12:9… “My grace is sufficient for you, …  “But Lord…” I said, “I NEED to know”.  Still He says, 2 Corinthians 12:9… for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”.    “Just a hint… pleaseeeee”, I say.  But still He says, 2 Corinthians 12:9… “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”   Can you tell, He is still working on me? I like things neat and tidy, all ‘my ducks in a row’.   Like a chess player, I want to know my moves and His moves too, ahead of time.  But I’ve been called to wait, right now.  “Wait! Lord, I hate to wait”.  I think He knows that, don’t you? Which is why He continues to whisper… 2 Corinthians 12:9… “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” Maybe soon, I’ll get it right.  Maybe today, I’ll say like Paul, 2 Corinthians 12:9…”Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me”.   

I will say the words, because I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that my God can be trusted; that He is faithful to finish what He started in me (Philippians 1:6).  I will wait to be told what’s next. closing1brenda

 

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