Becoming HIS Tapestry

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MEN, YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS…

Hello friends, how are you today? Wishing you the best day today, truly the choice is yours. Ps. 73 2In the early part of our marriage, soon after kids came along, our marriage went through a rough patch.  I remember calling my mom and saying, “I’m done mom, I can’t do this anymore”.  The truth is, it’s not that I couldn’t, I just didn’t want to anymore.  My mom, in her wisdom, but to my frustration, succinctly said; “you made your bed, you lie in it”.  She also added that there had never been divorce in the family and I will not start that practice. Now, my husband will say, he can’t remember that, which is more than likely true.  I did a lot of talking in my head. But in my defense, there was too much talking, not enough listening.  What’s a girl to do, when every road she wants to take is blocked? She tells the men what they need to know about women…

  1. Love the Lord with all your  heart, soul, might and strength. Love the Lord more than us. Stay close to the Lord.  We love seeing you in the Word.  We tend to believe in your love, when we see how much you love the Lord.  (Luke 10:27)
  2. Be the head of our home.  Now I know this may sound like an oxymoron when we are constantly battling with you for headship.  Extend grace to us; blame Eve, she was first.  If you humbly lead, we will follow. (I Corinthians 11:3)
  3. As women, we want to know, next to the Lord, we are #1 in your life.  We do not want to tie with, not do we want to compete with your parents, with your job, with your friends, with your games. (Genesis 2:24)
  4. Unless we are at war, or you are a soldier; we are your responsibility, not your parents’ nor are we our parents’ responsibility.  You are to look after us, care for us and provide for us financially and for our safety; you and God (of course). We are not wimpy women, truthfully it’s not that we can’t look after and provide for ourselves, (believe me, we can) but it’s not in your best interest if we do.  If we begin to look after and provide for ourselves, then we become independent of you and the truth is sooner or later we will begin to feel there is no need for you.  And when there is no need for you, well… (Ephesians 5:23)
  5. Be the dad to our kids, most of us wish we had.  Love them; make them a priority in your busy schedule.  When we got married; we did not sign up for being a ‘single but not really’ parent.  (Ephesians 6:4)
  6. Listen; I know we have the tendency to ramble and to you it may sound like noise, but most times we are trying to organize our thoughts and of course, there are times we like to hear ourselves.  You don’t always have to agree with us, even if that’s what we want you to do. Sometimes, we don’t even want you to fix our problems. Listen; among the words you will know our hearts.  Listen; it’s not the noise you should fear, it’s the silence.  (James 1:19)
  7. We are complete.  We are 100% complete, made in the image of God.  You do not validate us; you do not give us worth.  We are being remade in God’s image, not yours.  (Genesis 1:27)
  8. We are not your personal slave (That’s free)
  9. Submission is voluntary not forced.  We willing lay down our desire to be in control and allow you to lead, because we trust the Lord and want to obey Him.  Don’t make it harder for us by being a misogynist.  (I Peter 3:7)
  10. Love us (Ephesians 5:25)

Now I know there are some men and women who will ask the question, “what about the women?” Well, what about the women? Is the Word of God negotiable? Should we wait for one spouse to ‘get it together’ before we obey? According to Paul in Romans 6:15 and Galatians 5:13; the answer is No! But don’t worry we’ll get to us later… I thought the men should be first; them, being the head and all… I’m not sure I covered it all.  What are some things men need to know about women?closing1brenda

 

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43 responses to “MEN, YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS…”

  3. God Bless you, Brenda!! I strongly Agree We are equal in the sight of God who created man and woman. I couldn’t have said that many years ago. Because I truly didn’t know any better. That’s a long testimony of its self. But this is good for this generation, and the generation after it that may not know this now. There was no one that had told me this doing my years. I was caught up in the advertising of ” A woman bringing in the Bacon.” etc. The worst thing to do is to get advise from people that will tell you anything. Instead of going to the Bible for God’s counsel. Are from people that do give ((Wise)) counsel that will speak the truth, and not add on, are take off to just to please us. I enjoyed this message. \0/\0/ I look forward when it be what God has to say to us women. 🙂 ((Hugs))

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  5. Adam blamed Eve, she probably blamed him. This is sound marital advice. I recently read that submission means being on the same mission, not being bossed or treated like an inferior. Men do need to know this, women take too much abuse, Jesus freed women. I think He made them equals, men are naturally stronger and not as emotional, but women have wisdom and patience, bring peace to chaos. Thanks, Brenda.

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  7. Love the line – not that I couldn’t, but that I didn’t want to anymore. How often this is true in my obedience to God! Praise God you let Him keep molding your heart and for His faithfulness to us!

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  8. I agree with so much you said here! Most of the things you listed are things I saw in my own father, and are things I’m looking for in a spouse. One thing I do disagree with is how you said “blame Eve, she was first”. I disagree with this simply because Eve was deceived by Satan, whereas Adam knowingly sinned.
    I love your last comment where you said one spouse shouldn’t sit around waiting for the other one to get things right. As my pastor always says, marriage should be each person giving 100%.
    Great post! Can’ wait for what you have to say about ladies. 🙂

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  9. Brenda, thank ylou for this post. May I add husbands need to know because they provide for us that’s not a license to speak to us disrespectfully –– like a boss to a subordinate. Whether a wife works inside the home, outside or both, her contributions are valuable and she should be spoken to and treated with the same dignity and respect as they would their boss, peer or yes –– subordinate. Bless you for your faithfulness in blogging and shining for Him!

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    • I’ve been preparing and taking two girls to college 😲 this house has been a mad house! All this to say, please forgive the tardy response. And to say, thank you 🙏🏽 the Lord has truly been good to us. You are my hero; combining prayer and a gun 😁 love it 😍

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  11. Adding from a therapists experience…Being the head;
    *Does not mean control over your wife or family! Only God has that right & He gives freedom of choice in everything!
    * Does not mean abusing your wife & children either emotionally, mentally, spiritually or physically… this breaks the marriage covenant!
    God will deal with men who abuse the precious Princess & children He has given them!
    * Does not mean manipulation to get your own way! God blesses the humble & contrite man.
    Jesus is the example of the head…follow His gentle ways…
    Jennifer

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  13. This is really a lovely post…there has been a topic among men and women in my country about sharing of responsibility such as paying rent,school fees and other expenses…this days,the men are bent on a 50/50 share….i don’t think this is right…is it?…..
    Waiting…😊

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    • 😂😂😂 I found in the early part of our marriage, my husband had the misconception that physical labor job entitled him to a clean home all the time. I had to help a brother out and correct that thinking 🤣🤣🤣 He still loves me, so I guess it was a good thing

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